are you still at the devil's house?
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Randomize
