there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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