Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Let's paint friendship bongs
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Randomize
