Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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