I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
