No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
You made out with two different species that night
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
