I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
NoShamevember. You game?
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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