Where is the hickey?
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
