your thong is hanging out like whoa
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Randomize