It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
