Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
