She's JV to your varsity
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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