thus making me awesome and them whores
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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