I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
