it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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