Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Is Oprah even human
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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