You just made me feel so damn special
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize
