So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Randomize
