I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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