my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Randomize
