You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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