Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
