I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize
