how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Randomize
