CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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