Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
