she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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