if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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