what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
