coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Randomize
