OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Randomize
