I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
You made out with two different species that night
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
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