I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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