dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
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