i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize