The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
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