Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
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