you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
