AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
Randomize
