K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
as a side note pls kill me
I use my feet as sexual weapons
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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