none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
Randomize