also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
