im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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