Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Randomize
