Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize
