ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize