chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
dude. I can hear the air.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
