New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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