There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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