if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize
