So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
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