Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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